Today I went to the mail box and was very happy with what was there :)

Today I hoped the tide had changed permanently but sadly no...

Today I dreamed of new beginnings

Today I forgot  to get the letter out of the car

Today I heard more geese fly overhead even though its 30c

Today I said he was a selfish bastard - and I meant it.  He is.

Today I read all about my new class.

Today I watched Sam walking along looking through his mini telescope :)

Today I believed my fate lies in the hands of a totally selfish bastard :(

Today I felt powerless to protect my children the totally selfish bastard that doesn't seem to care about their futures and best interests :(

Today I wondered endlessly how best to deal with this situation

Today I bought a french cd and lemonade.

Today I cleaned my bathroom.

Today I was riding a roller coaster.  I am happy and had a wonderful day with my children - we enjoyed the gorgeous weather and our time out - we had a great day homeschooling and Abigail enjoyed her class.  we had fun at the park - I had a good time with Susannah there - the farmers market was fun too.  It was a great learning day :)  It was also a good day for developments regarding Abigail and therapy.  She also had a good day and no melt downs!!  It was a GOOD day :)  The only bad part was dealing with divorce stuff.  Get that out of the way and life will be perfect :)

Our Wednesday.....

This morning was spent studying French for Abigail while I was busy on the telephone mainly (see post below).  Abigail also spent time using Studyladder and also Google translator and getting it to answer me and my questions - typing fast to answer me with funny and quick responses - it was hilarious!  

Sam has a cold and isn't feeling great so isn't in the mood to do workbooks right now and I refuse to push him as it just upsets him and puts him off completely and I don't want to turn him off of learning.  So instead he watched Batman, rode his bike outside with Abby for a while, studied his cocoons and caterpillars for a while, played with the magnet sets, and built a man with arms that opened doors and had jointed arms and hands and feet etc with Knex.  

Tonight he used his new mini telescope and microscope to examine endless things.

I think a LOT of learning took place today even though he didn't open a work book :) 

Susannah attended a team building day at Birch Bay Ranch today.  She enjoyed it although was disappointed not to get to use the ziplines or horses that they normally get to use - they did get to use the towers though and Sharon that runs the Ranch told them that we were hotter than Hawaii today!  It was 30c here today :)  It is GORGEOUS weather - so lucky :)  

It was early out at school today which meant schools closed at 2pm.  When Susannah got home we headed to the library in town for Abigails class.  A Roald Rumpus'.  It was a class based on Roald Dahls books.  While she was in the class Susannah picked up another of her series of books by Susan Desson I think it is - she is really enjoying that series and finishes them in a day or two.  I love that she is reading so much suddenly :)  I have told her she HAS to borrow them from the library now though as I can't afford to keep buying them at the store at the rate she reads them!!!

Abigail enjoyed her class and came out with chocolate and a whistle and a sticker on her that read E Crocodile - and she had picked a Roald Dahl book to take out of the library.  I might get her to read it to Sam tomorrow or maybe I will read it to them both.  

After that we went to Education Station next door as I wanted to pick up a cd of French songs to listen to in the car.  We found a good one that covers exactly what we are learning at the moment - colours, numbers, body parts etc etc.

While I was looking round, the children played in the play area, including Susannah who LOVES the magnetix or whatever they are called - the triangle things that sam has at home - although they all seem to have gone missing somewhere again:

After the Education Station, we walked down towards the farmers market and had a stroll around there.  This week they had a big bouncy slide.  It hasn't been there before so we couldn't resist checking it out!  It was only a dollar for two goes!!!  

Then we headed over to Broadmoor Lake for an hour or two of relaxing in the sunshine while Sam and Abby played at the playground.  Susannah and I chatted and tried out a couple of new math games:

And cooled down in the hot sun with some delicious lemonade:

Before heading back to check on Laurence who had decided not to stay in town as he had a bad head so had gone straight home from school on the early bus instead.  When we got home he was fine after having a sleep.  He is going to start on some melatonin again - he hasn't needed it for a few weeks after getting his sleep cycle back to normal but now its off again so he is going to take it again.  

This evening Abigail listened to the new French cd...her and Sam played with the magnet set again and she worked on her French homework again learning how to say 'touch your' and parts of the body...as well as seasons and weather, and days of the week...

Bed time now.  Not sure what we are doing tomorrow yet - we have a free day until tomorrow evening.  The weather is going to be gorgeous so we really should make the most of it.  Maybe a picnic somewhere.  Maybe a splashpark.  Not sure.  One thing is for sure - we will be making the most of these last few days of Summer :)  

Enjoy the heat everyone

xxx

Hump day :)

Wednesday already!  this week is going fast but I guess that is always the way with long weekends!

Today was another busy one.  This morning I had a lot of phone calls to make - various calls regarding school issues, busing issues, medical issues and financial issues to deal with.  Unfortunately I also had to deal with my idiot of an Ex and his insane mood swings.  For someone who has criticized my mood swings for the last 18 months, I can't BELIEVE how rapidly and how drastically HIS moods change and they are stressful to deal with because unfortunately he likes to try and control my life and that means he also likes to try and control my childrens lives too.  He is also in control of us financially - and our future and is leaving us in a pretty bad way :(    There are ways out of our situation but I can't take them without his help and signature and yet he won't take them and to me it makes absolutely NO sense....he has thrown away soooooo much money in the last 18 months so two years and for a business man it is just sickening.  What FATHER does that????  SERIOUSLY?????  What kind of Father throws away all of his money and leaves his kids in this kind of situation just to get back at his wife????  What kind of MAN does that?????

I have lost any kind of respect for him that I ever had....it's so sad....I used to look up at him more than anyone else on this planet.  Now.....now?  Now I'm not sure I think of anyone less.  He would hurt my children that way and think so little of them.  That he would rather waste money on lawyers fees than on putting his children first.  He would rather send money to some guy he barely knows in the US than put his kids into sports.  He would put some guy he barely likes from work before his kids happiness.

Kathy posted something fabulous on her FB today:  If you want changes in your life....the first and best place to look is in the mirror. Just over 8 months ago I began to really look in that mirror and started to work on myself... so I could be a better me, not just for myself, but those in my life. If you want change....it all starts with YOU!


I couldn't agree more!  And this is exactly what I have done over the last year.  Through therapy, classes, self help, journaling, and BLOODY HARD WORK!!!!  And I am happy with the changes I have made and the person I have become.  I am happy with the Mom I am now.  The friend I am now.  That I am calmer, happier, more independent, more relaxed, more assertive.  I laugh more, play more, work more, plan more, create more, think more, try more, believe more.  I am more confident.  


Taking the time to work on me after my separation was the best thing I could have done for my children.  They deserved it.  They deserved to have the best me they could have.  They NEEDED me to be healthy in body and mind.  They needed me to learn ways to cope better, to be stronger, happier, healthier.  And while I am still finding this divorce crappola very stressful, at least I am finding ways to handle it without yelling and screaming or crying or being depressed.  These days I create art  or journal and have other ways to release tension.  I also don't have anyone to 'pretend' for....to be a certain way for....I can be myself.....and that is wonderful.  It is extremely freeing to be able to totally be yourself in your own home.  For the first time in ten years to be able to totally be yourself.  

Haircut tomorrow - thank goodness ;)  

Which means therapy with Amber  - the one person who who knocks sense in to me :)  Tells me exactly what she thinks and gives me shit when I act pathetic!!  What would I do without her???

and meeting JoAnne afterwards :)  Yay - we haven't seen each other since the day she moved house!!  Far, far too long my girly :)  xxx

Our Tuesday...

We had French club today, and so our day started off with Abigail revising her her French homework, and practicing her introduction, numbers and colours, ready for class.  She then worked through some of her French workbook which today focused on the alphabet in French.

Sam really wasn't in the best of moods this morning for 'work' and so although we encouraged him, after a page of spellings he disappeared off to his room.

On the way to French club we stopped off to buy snacks to share at the club - and also to get a Pumpkin Spice Latte - a they started to sell them today.  Then onwards to Castledowns Library.  On the way we practiced more French, and Abigail managed to get Sam interested at last - and he practiced his own introduction, numbers etc etc.

French club was really good today.  The children started with playing games on a French cd - that involved listening to songs and following the actions - learning words such as jump, run, walk, stop, fast, slow, high.

We also played 'Jacques Di' (Simon Says) and 'What's the  time Mr Wolf?'

The children introduced themselves - their names, ages, and said something that they liked to do.  

They did some worksheets about colours.  

We meet again in two weeks time.  

(the other children were still at the table doing other things when I snapped this picture but I snapped it because they were playing a game and had their backs to the camera so the other childrens faces aren't shown)  

Laurence has changed his class finally - is no longer doing physics which was worrying him, and is now doing personal foods this Semester as well as science.  He is much happier :)  

Susannah is happy about her new guitar teacher and the fact that he is so laid back (she says he reminds her of me and that I should go and meet him as we suit each other.....lol)  She really likes him and the fact that he has such great ideas and wants them to put on a play.  

I have to phone transportation tomorrow and put in  complaint about Laurences bus driver :(  I don't like doing that but two issues have come up with her now - she hit our address post with the bus and didn't even report it - and she is turning in our driveway even though they have been told not to (our driveway is clearly not wide enough - hence her hitting the gatepost sigh) and now because Laurence told her she isn't supposed to turn in the driveway, she now does not way for him to sit down before driving off but instead pulls away fast while he is walking down the bus aisle so he almost falls over each time.  I am NOT happy with this situation.  Today she left a snotty message on my phone about if I don't want her to turn on the driveway then I have to phone transportation - so tomorrow I will!

The children went to their Dads this evening, but while they were waiting, Sam and Abby curled up on my bed and watched some documentaries.  First they watched another dinosaur show (Sams favourites) and then they watched an Animal Planet show called 'Animals go head to head' which was a show where they compare two animals and see which would win in a battle.  They got to see which would win between a crocodile and a Great white shark!  

Tonight while the children were out, I had the first homeschool Moms coffee night.  About a month ago I started a Facebook group for my areas homeschoolers.  There are now 39 members :)  I suggested a coffee night tonight and there were 10 of us that showed up :)  I'm thrilled!!!  I only expected about 4 at the most!  But 10!!!  :)  And they want to make it a monthly event!  :)  

We ended up chatting for three hours tonight and it was just a really nice evening.  I saw friends I see regularly, friends I haven't seen for YEARS and met some new friends too!!  :)  

All in all another great day.  

Tomorrows plans are looking just as good too - Abigail has her class in the afternoon and Susannah has her team building class at Birch Bay in the morning.  The weather is supposed to be gorgeous so I think we will make the most of it as much as possible - seems silly to waste the good weather when it will soon be gone!  

I haven't done my LSNED class work for today but I'm too tired now so that will have to wait until the morning.  

Tomorrow morning I have a telephone appointment with Abigails therapist to discuss how she is doing.        

Ok, I need to get to sleep.  Another busy day tomorrow.  

Have a good one everyone

xxx